Stuff That's Been Said Around Our House
Not all of these are recent -- but they are ALL real.
Amanda:
When Lily declared herself "The Princess," Amanda's brow furrowed momentarily -- but her face suddenly brightened considerably, and then she said smugly, "Well, that must make me the queen."
In Primary singing time the other day, children were being called on to share their favorite song, which all the children would then sing. Amanda's teacher leaned over to her and whispered, "What's your favorite song, Amanda?" "' I Wanna Rock and Roll All Night and Party Every Day'," she replied nonchalantly. When Amanda was called on by the song leader, she leaned over to her teacher and whispered, "I changed my mind." She selected "I Am a Child of God" instead.
Lily:
Like most two-year-olds, Lily doesn't pronounce every word with exact correctness. We'll sometimes try to coach her by repeatedly saying the syllable she's having trouble with (i.e. "r-r-r-rock" instead of "wock"). One day she was trying to tell us something about some "owie" she had, but we didn't hear her the first time she said it. In a very exasperated tone, she stated (more clearly this time), "I have an owie on my th-th-th-flumb!" -- and held up the injured "flumb" (thumb) as proof. She was looking at us like we were absolute half-wits. If you want a good laugh, find a condescending two-year-old.
Today I caught Lily sneaking around in the pantry not long after breakfast. She had pulled a barstool over there and was rummaging around for some snack or another, I'm sure. She was caught red-handed -- there was no escaping! I confronted her: "Lily, what are you doing?" Lily, wide-eyed and very off-guard: "Nothing." Me, more pressing this time: "Lily, you are not to lie to me. What are you doing?" Lily, looking shifty and searching for a true answer that won't get her in trouble: "Um....I'm not getting into the pretzels!" Well, clearly this was also a lie. However, she said it with such great hope and her signature 'if-I-shrug-my-shoulders-and-look-really-cute-I-MIGHT-get-outta-this' look that I decided to let it go.
Benson:
Since Benson doesn't really say a lot that we can understand (he frequently carries on conversations with us like we really know what he's saying -- but it's all gibberish), I'll just relate an experience that happened a few minutes ago. Benson has a fascination with the toilet, and if I don't keep a close eye on him, he will invariably steal away for a few precious moments with his porcelain friend (this is usually short-lived; as soon as I'm aware of the rendezvous, it is quickly put to an end). Today he opted to take an old cloth diaper (the kind I use for burp cloths when the babies are little) and swish it around in the toilet water before letting it drip onto the bathroom floor. When I happened upon the scene, there was basically no water left in the toilet -- but an awful lot of water on the bathroom floor. I surprised him so much when I said his name that he slipped in the water and landed right on his big round belly. This was so upsetting to him that he immediately began making what I can only describe as a face-down toilet water angel. Yeah, THAT'LL show me, Benson.
Amanda:
When Lily declared herself "The Princess," Amanda's brow furrowed momentarily -- but her face suddenly brightened considerably, and then she said smugly, "Well, that must make me the queen."
In Primary singing time the other day, children were being called on to share their favorite song, which all the children would then sing. Amanda's teacher leaned over to her and whispered, "What's your favorite song, Amanda?" "' I Wanna Rock and Roll All Night and Party Every Day'," she replied nonchalantly. When Amanda was called on by the song leader, she leaned over to her teacher and whispered, "I changed my mind." She selected "I Am a Child of God" instead.
Lily:
Like most two-year-olds, Lily doesn't pronounce every word with exact correctness. We'll sometimes try to coach her by repeatedly saying the syllable she's having trouble with (i.e. "r-r-r-rock" instead of "wock"). One day she was trying to tell us something about some "owie" she had, but we didn't hear her the first time she said it. In a very exasperated tone, she stated (more clearly this time), "I have an owie on my th-th-th-flumb!" -- and held up the injured "flumb" (thumb) as proof. She was looking at us like we were absolute half-wits. If you want a good laugh, find a condescending two-year-old.
Today I caught Lily sneaking around in the pantry not long after breakfast. She had pulled a barstool over there and was rummaging around for some snack or another, I'm sure. She was caught red-handed -- there was no escaping! I confronted her: "Lily, what are you doing?" Lily, wide-eyed and very off-guard: "Nothing." Me, more pressing this time: "Lily, you are not to lie to me. What are you doing?" Lily, looking shifty and searching for a true answer that won't get her in trouble: "Um....I'm not getting into the pretzels!" Well, clearly this was also a lie. However, she said it with such great hope and her signature 'if-I-shrug-my-shoulders-and-look-really-cute-I-MIGHT-get-outta-this' look that I decided to let it go.
Benson:
Since Benson doesn't really say a lot that we can understand (he frequently carries on conversations with us like we really know what he's saying -- but it's all gibberish), I'll just relate an experience that happened a few minutes ago. Benson has a fascination with the toilet, and if I don't keep a close eye on him, he will invariably steal away for a few precious moments with his porcelain friend (this is usually short-lived; as soon as I'm aware of the rendezvous, it is quickly put to an end). Today he opted to take an old cloth diaper (the kind I use for burp cloths when the babies are little) and swish it around in the toilet water before letting it drip onto the bathroom floor. When I happened upon the scene, there was basically no water left in the toilet -- but an awful lot of water on the bathroom floor. I surprised him so much when I said his name that he slipped in the water and landed right on his big round belly. This was so upsetting to him that he immediately began making what I can only describe as a face-down toilet water angel. Yeah, THAT'LL show me, Benson.
Comments
And yes,"doozer" is in fact a real word. Its most common usage is as follows: "Watch that first step; it's a doozer."
If you don't believe me, ask Kristin B. She'll back me up.